Lost 2 Pounds!
Image of the day: Hippos Enjoying a Mud BathAmazing news! I shed two whole pounds yesterday and could fit into my Shinjuku robe.
Got Gary and Eric with that one; Chatto wasn’t convinced. In fact, what happened yesterday is that I hurdled over the 600-lb mark in one fierce day of tag-team calorie shifting with Manuel (see below.)
Must say that it was a quiet day at the ranch otherwise, so I don’t have much to report other than that I spent most of the day bathing in mud (a terrific new strategy so popular in Mexico we’re thinking about starting our own outfit here). Mud bathing is absolutely terrific because no matter how many hundreds of pounds you’ve put on, you feel like a featherweight once you’re chin deep in ooze. We built our mud bath right next to the Seagal Lifetime Achievement’s Tent and have named it The Bayou.
Manuel is calling me (what would I do without him?) for a second round of Who Ate My Calories? so I’m off. Enjoy yesterday’s calorie shifts.
Yesterday’s Calorie Shifts:
Breakfast (Uribe’s choice)
Eggo’s Community Pack (don’t know where Manuel found this), Tamarind Log, Crisco-marinated Pork Rinds, Crisco, Mexican Wedding Cake
Mid-Morning Snack (Seagal’s choice)
Peppered Cheddar Log, Quart Wesson, 10 lbs Cured Feta Balls, 50 Meatballs, Rubermaid Laundry Tub, 7 Quarts Alphabet Soup, Carvel Fudgie the Whale (I was obviously flexing my muscles here, but pay attention to Manuel’s next move, it’s pure genius. My countermove was, unfortunately, rubbish.)
Lunch (Uribe)
4 Pirelli Tires, Gallon Castor GTX, Income Tax
Mid-Afternoon Snack (Seagal)
Spare Cart Parts (???)
Dinner (Uribe)
Cart
Explanation of Yesterday’s Calorie Shifts:
What can I say, Manuel’s the best. Lost the last round, of course, and the round before. Will have to order Manuel a new cart.
My Weight: 602 lbs
Mitsubishi Lancer 2-door: 1,750 lbs
April Fools!!!
Got Gary and Eric with that one; Chatto wasn’t convinced. In fact, what happened yesterday is that I hurdled over the 600-lb mark in one fierce day of tag-team calorie shifting with Manuel (see below.)
Must say that it was a quiet day at the ranch otherwise, so I don’t have much to report other than that I spent most of the day bathing in mud (a terrific new strategy so popular in Mexico we’re thinking about starting our own outfit here). Mud bathing is absolutely terrific because no matter how many hundreds of pounds you’ve put on, you feel like a featherweight once you’re chin deep in ooze. We built our mud bath right next to the Seagal Lifetime Achievement’s Tent and have named it The Bayou.
Manuel is calling me (what would I do without him?) for a second round of Who Ate My Calories? so I’m off. Enjoy yesterday’s calorie shifts.
Yesterday’s Calorie Shifts:
Breakfast (Uribe’s choice)
Eggo’s Community Pack (don’t know where Manuel found this), Tamarind Log, Crisco-marinated Pork Rinds, Crisco, Mexican Wedding Cake
Mid-Morning Snack (Seagal’s choice)
Peppered Cheddar Log, Quart Wesson, 10 lbs Cured Feta Balls, 50 Meatballs, Rubermaid Laundry Tub, 7 Quarts Alphabet Soup, Carvel Fudgie the Whale (I was obviously flexing my muscles here, but pay attention to Manuel’s next move, it’s pure genius. My countermove was, unfortunately, rubbish.)
Lunch (Uribe)
4 Pirelli Tires, Gallon Castor GTX, Income Tax
Mid-Afternoon Snack (Seagal)
Spare Cart Parts (???)
Dinner (Uribe)
Cart
Explanation of Yesterday’s Calorie Shifts:
What can I say, Manuel’s the best. Lost the last round, of course, and the round before. Will have to order Manuel a new cart.
My Weight: 602 lbs
Mitsubishi Lancer 2-door: 1,750 lbs
posted by The Master at
12:32 PM
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